Late to the Cultural Zeitgeist #1

Sullied Soapbox: Being fashionably late extends not to joining the party long after the expiration of memories of the festivity. I apologize for this faux pas. Say what you want about Dwight Schrute, but he never missed a beet.

I always understood The Indian in the Cupboard. He wanted his spices back.

Why did Betamax put itself in second place by merit of its own nomenclature?

Even before the current outbreak, the US halted all immigration from the Kokiri Forest for fear of its denizens invading and declaring Saria Law. This is a holdover from the Carter administration... Those simpletons!

Archie Bunker proved Western complacency in his name. Extrapolate basic linguistic concepts and ye shall find TRUTH: archers patrol perimeters as closer troops hunker in bunkers. All quiet on all agreed-upon fronts. Archers. Bunkers.

Shag rugs are perverts. Look at the term! Also, I am illiterate and feel nothing.

Were the US military to clone Gomer as fodder for all sorts of offensives, what would they then call the subsequent piles? And here we have a series.

"Ford" as a brand came together as a result of Henry Ford's childhood inability to catch and ride frogs. His ego showed disturbing levels of hostility. Headlights? Deadlights.

In America, culinary and popular cultures clash concerning the quintessence of which is the best /blan(t)SH/.

Given the specificity of other fruits, "orange juice" can no longer coast upon its laurels. Porterhouse persimmons please.